One on Won

Ol' Si feels like Janus some days.  The image of a god that looks forward and backwards at the same time.  You need to be able to do that to survive in The Valley. What has happened? What will it lead to? Always good to think like that.  The rear view may not have the answers, but does have a lot of clues that can loosely be interpreted as a guide.

Troubleshooting RF electronics is easier with a lot of rear view mirror time. But, even with a 50+ years of experience, 'troubleshooting' human beings or predicting their behavior is still a low probability affairs.

I was stuck in the airport during a long weather related delay.  Nursing a beer, I struck up a conversation with a seeming shy women at the barstool next to me. As we discussed what we did, I found out she was in sales.  Over the course of a couple of drinks, she described her world and what it took to be successful. And, apparently, she was very successful.

The key to be a successful salesperson, she said, was the 'will to win'. But, strangely, not her will, the other persons. Huh? Aren't salesmen hyper competitive? 'Killer instinct' as the usually short, loud, and whiny sales managers I have worked with would say.

After a few minutes, she explained why most in sales fail. "Everyone has to win, has to be right. Most salesmen are ex- jocks, ex- beauty queens, ex- something. Always need to be stroked and be told they are the best, right, or whatever. The customer typically also has a big ego, and enjoys the thrill of winning. Key difference is that the customer has the money. So, the customer has to 'win'. Your job is to determine if letting them win is worth your time and effort". In other words, you must control your ego, the demand to win.  You need to win a war, not fight every battle to the death.

In her words, control your need to win, focus only on important things that help reach a goal. Easy to say, tough to do.

I am lucky to know a few people who have survived huge setbacks, both personal and professional. Many are still forging ahead with a positive attitude.  Yet, many more have been smacked by one life event have changed... not for the better. They set unrealistic standards and goals based on someone else's life in a much different time. Their plan isn't working and they are angry.

Going back to the airport and the conversation with the saleswoman. 'Have to be right....big ego'. Sounds like a plausible reason for friends' attitude changes. Many were top scholars, great athletes, talented musicians. Then they weren't. They became bitter and jealousy took over. If you are like Ol' Si, doing OK and adjusting your goals to meet reality, they hate you. You are a loafer or a simple mind.

Some things in life seem to get larger with time. Waistlines, medical bills, consumption of Scotch. Some get smaller ... like my Holiday Card mailing list. Stay happy, avoid those who aren't. I am.